Writer's own thoughts!

I made you the man you are today, You depleted the woman I was.  And, yes, if you say you made me  the woman I am,  You are correct!  You've filled me with inner love that I lost  loving another with my entire existence, my whole life!  See, depletion is sometimes beautiful but not eternally.  In depletion do we find ourselves and restore the broken pieces.  Find what was lost.  In depletion, we start seeking from ourselves what we cannot find from others. Depletion is another form of completion.  Just another phase of the coin,  One day, I'll be complete after the period of depletion.  I know the end is near. ©® Farheen Akter Bhuian Nancy  Time Frame: 9.10 am, Tagar, MIST

 In another timeline,  In another realm, You were in love while I was lying in deathbed,  Playing hide and seek with the dead and ruins. In another timeline,  In another occasion,  Our roads never crossed together,  We never saw each other's smiling face.  Nor did we bother to collide in.  In another timeline,  You were sulking your face deep into another's chest while I was running.... Running from another's suffocating arms, Only to remain lonely. In another timeline,  In another phase of life, You are chasing something else,  I am looking for stability... In another lifetime, perhaps,  We will lock our hands, fill the space  with each other's fingers and cross paths again, Maybe, that day you will kiss me longer  and give me a deep neck scar.  Perhaps, in that parallel world,  Without any doubts or confusion- I will stay. I will stay with you, No distractions would then sway! Perhaps, then, we will be ins...

 Hey, Cupid, you are wandering around the Garden of Eden for a while now, The roots are growing, so the leaves of the hazelnut tree, Oh, you with hazelnut-colored eyes, One glance of yours is enough to consume all of me! I am a spotted butterfly wandering lonely, I want you to pick a flower for me! I am confused whose necter might taste sweeter? The blooming one or the already bloomed? The silent ache in my heart beats around the bushes, Oh, I can't choose! Oh, I don't know which direction to go! Which path to take? Where might there be peace and delight? Oh, Cupid the god of love,  Please, choose better for me! Cupid smirked with a straight face. So, you want a perfect love filled with the sweetness of heavenly nectar? Oh, nothing is perfect, nothing is sweet, Sometimes it is bittersweet. Sometimes poisonous yet addictive, It's entirely up to you to select and adapt. I cannot do it for you! Complexity may attract us, but  It's simplicity that keeps us. Complexes may in...

 It's all in my head and I am tired of these psychological warfares,  You ain't existent in my life but yet you stay 24/7 in my head,  I imagine scenarios that's never going to happen,  Nor do you will chase me so do I.  Is there any full-stop of this day dreaming and utopias?! You are just an illusion that I imagine day and night!  You block my ways and interrupt my healing, I was fine alone- atoned! I was fine in a cage where I locked myself!  I was an obedient prisoner there!  But, why do you need to screw me by making me feel your racing heartbeat?!  Your heartbeats say they belong to me! You still love me! A decade after it will still beat for me!  I want to end this endless psychological warfare,  You are everywhere yet nowhere,  I search for you in every person I meet,  I look for the same attributes,  You should go away from my mind and heart,  But, how do I ward off these sentiments  when only you t...

 The divine sound of your heartbeat lingers with me in my heart, It only belongs to me, As you own my heart... Did you feel my heartbeat too in those brief moments? Did you? Did you recognize how much I love you? Did you? Did you see it through my eyes? How a river of tears flowed from those after seeing you? I couldn't believe it, I still can't, You were present in front of my eyes, I could touch you- For a brief period of time  and it was as if for eternity! Those brief moments will stay with me for eternity! As if a thousand decades of longings revived, As if decade long thirst and quest is finished when your lips touched mine, As if you have crossed thousand of years and miles only to reach my lips, As if I have been depriving myself from the sweetness of love, From touch of your holy hands for centuries .... As if I have been lost for decades then I refound myself in you! Oh, my sighs! Oh, my regrets! Oh, my fault! The fault in our misaligned stars! How can I ask you from...

 I wish I could preserve your eyes, your looks, your gaze into my jewels,  I wish no single tear drop sheds from your beautiful eyes,  But.........! Do you know one theory about beautiful eyes?!  The most beautiful eyes cries the most,  Dreadful cries,  Earth-cracking cries,  They shout in pain and loss and griefs,  Yes, eyes do have voice and It's rain!  Yes, eyes do have love and It's gain!  Eyes do have a tale of longing and separation,  Eyes do speaks a ton when words don't know how to be speculated,  Eyes speaks tales of a decades,  A decade long separation and a forever kind of love,  Why do the lover girl seeks so much?!  Why does she notice so much?!  Why must she read between the lines and read souls?! Read destiny's whispers?!   Why must she look into otherwise?!  Why can't she look away and forget?!  A burden of grief is sitting heavily on her chest!  Why must she recogniz...

 Stay my unrequited love my love,  Once pure always remains pure,  Don't get filtrated among the others,  Don't come close,  Don't come in contact,  Cause, I am addictive and you won't forget me for the next three decades and lifelong! Don't come close,  Don't cross the borders,  I don't want you to! You are the albatross who shall fly high,  You are my little secret that I hide, I know I can't undo anything nor can I forget you,  Your heartbeat is replaying in my brain,  My prefrontal cortex is governed by your shadows.  My subconscious is ruled by your sweet memories,  Sweet kisses, and gentle strokes,  The way you used to call me 'Fairy'  Is playing in a loop in my head,  You live inside my unconsciousness.  Consciously I try to repress your warmth, Your height,  Your enormous muscle weight, yet you are so light!  Light in demeanour,  Soft in tone,  And, your softened eyes! Oh, ho...

I am a Jew in Love...  A wanderer punished by the God  I could not obey, Cast into deserts of thirst because  my tongue refused The Manna and Salwa  He poured from the heavens. I hungered for another taste.... Your mouth, not his mercy. And for that sin, I was exiled. I am a Jew in love... Cursed to roam in the burning sand of your absence, My skin cracking like ancient parchment, Each wound a scripture rewritten by longing. Even God turned his face from me, For I worshipped your shadow instead of his throne. I am a Jew in love.... Rejecting his celestial bread, His divine quail, Because nothing holy ever fed me the way your body once did... Salt of your collarbone, Honey of your inner wrists, Heat between your fingers where I buried my prayers, my beliefs, How could Manna ever compete with that? I am a Jew in love... Punished for confusing your darkness with revelation, For choosing the ecstasy of forbidden flesh over the discipline of heaven. So he sent me wande...

  A Dream of the Lost Archer     Psyche drifts in a twilight garden, Where roses bloom black as midnight and rivers run silver with moonlight. She walks barefoot, The soil was soft and warm beneath her trembling feet, But the air is sharp, scented with longing. Ahead, a shadow moves...a flicker of gold. Her heart catches. Her breath shards like broken glass. It is he. Cupid. But not the god she remembers. He is taller, darker, Wings half-burned,  Eyes carrying the weight of centuries. He does not speak. He does not touch. He only tilts his head. And in that glance, She feels every stolen kiss. Every arrow fired, Every pulse of desire that once made worlds tremble. A wind rises. The black roses bow. The silver river swirls, And when Psyche reaches for him, He fades into light. Becoming a constellation in the shape of a broken bow. A whisper rides the wind: “We were never meant to touch again, But, you(Pysche) will always carry my fire.” Psyche wakes, Her ches...

  Epilogue: The Universe Remembers Them   - the cosmos speaks of two souls who loved outside their destiny Listen closely, wanderer .... For the stars still carry  their names in the quietest pulse of light. Not every love becomes a legend. Not every longing becomes myth. But Cupid and Psyche....... They were the rare kind. the kind that left scars on fate itself. You ask what became of them? And what happened to them? I will tell you. Cupid lived out his days bound to another’s warmth, offering smiles that never reached the deepest chambers of his heart. He loved, yes.... But lightly, carefully, As if afraid that any devotion too strong would awaken a memory he was forbidden to keep. His laugh echoed in temples. His touch is kind, his arrows precise.... But his soul remained half-lit like a lantern missing its eternal flame. And Psyche..............! Oh, Psyche walked the earth with a quiet ache, Carrying the ghost of a god she could no longer name. She loved wrong...

  Echoes of the Unclaimed  Years have passed. Psyche walks through a winter street, Her hair streaked with silver and her heart still tender, Still raw from the love that never stayed. she smiles politely at strangers, But in quiet corners of her soul She feels a bow strung across her ribs, and an arrow trembling with a name she cannot speak aloud. Cupid moves through another life, His golden wings folded beneath a mortal’s touch, His laughter warm, his eyes tender, But the nights are cold and empty. Every heartbeat whispers her name, Even when another rests in his arms. Every arrow he fires carries a memory of her pulse, A longing that cannot be regained. One evening, Psyche visits a garden where roses bloom even in frost. She leans against a marble fountain, Watching the stars mirror themselves in the water. And, there... Somewhere across time, across fate... Cupid is watching the same constellation. His hand brushes another’s cheek while his soul aches for hers. They do not...

  Threads of the Unclaimed  The stars hang low, trembling, As if they, too, mourn the love that will never be together again, For love that is faded, Cupid stands at the edge of a gilded balcony. His golden wings dulled, clipped by the weight of a promise he cannot keep. Another woman holds his heart now...someone mortal, tender, undeserving. Yet fate demanded it. He touches her hand, feels the warmth, But every pulse whispers Psyche’s name. Psyche walks alone through a city of shadows and roses. Her heart freshly scarred from a toxic love, Love that came after Cupid's—her forgotten one, Its tendrils are still curling around her nostrils. She can smell the foul odor(of previous toxic love).... Yet, she searches for the blurred face in crowded streets, Fresh fragrance of her sacred love(Cupid's)... Hungry for a touch, a spark, a reminder of what was, or what could have been... But the fire in her soul finds no reflection. Every glance is empty, every whisper a ghost. They exist...

   Cupid’s Answer to Her Truth  .....Where divine anger meets divine desire So you speak, Psyche.... Bare, trembling, stripped of every lie. Your truth lands on my skin like a wounded star falling home. You think I wanted perfection? No......! I wanted you. Your flaws, your fear, your wandering ache..... The whole fragile constellation of your humanity that keeps me orbiting around you like a punished god. But hear me clearly..... Your words burn. To imagine another man pressing his unearned warmth against the body I shaped in destiny’s shadow.... It steels my veins with a fury, Bright enough to blind Olympus,  To melt down the entire Everest with the burning fire in my chest, Yet even through that fire, I feel something else.... Something older than betrayal, Something deeper than pride: Your soul leaning toward mine, Like it always has, Like it always will. You faltered. Yes. You touched the wrong fate. You let a mortal trespass into my altar. But you came back wit...

  There is a mole on the right side of my chest... A dark little witness to the centuries I’ve lived, A stamp from the universe that says: “ You were loved before you were born , and wounded long before you learned to breathe.” It feels like a burnt kiss from a lover I lost in another era, A lover who died with my name on his tongue, A lover whose shadow still presses into my ribs whenever the moon grows round and full,  Then the air thickens with déjà vu. Sometimes I touch it and feel the ghost of his hands....shadows of his scent, Not from this life, but from the one where I drowned myself in his chest like a prayer refusing to end, Where our bodies were constellations mapped in secret, Where we made love the way stars collapse... Desperate,  Inevitable,  Catastrophic. My rising sun remembers him like a forbidden scripture hidden between bones. My dewy moon dreams about him as a star I chase across lifetimes, Always almost reaching, Always almost losing. My pat...

I am a white orchid in your orchard, The rare bloom that trembles only for your winds. Can you recognize me?! Or must I wither once more before your eyes finally learn my name? I have waited through seasons of forgetting, Through suns that burned too close and moons that pulled me open like tides teaching my petals the ache of longing. I grew in the hidden corners where shadows claim the abandoned, Yet still I turned toward the faintest glow of you my quiet, distant gardener of fate. Do you see me now, The way my fragrance rises like a prayer from the depths of old heartbreaks? Do you feel how my softness holds a history of storms, uprootings, and the loneliness of blooming where no footsteps ever pause? I am a white orchid but my soul is not white it is inked with past lives, With the memory of abandoned lovers Who recognized me too late and whom I had  to leave behind.... Still I stand here, Pure in my defiance, Tender in my survival. Come closer.... Trace the trembling of my pe...

We were only children when my heart first learned the quiet ache of worship... Your name, a small sun, orbiting every corner of me. You laughed, and seasons changed. I loved, But, destinies didn’t. Maybe, you too loved.... But, your love was purer than mine... A fine wine...! I carried that tenderness like a secret bruise under my skin... Untouched,  Unspoken, but always blooming, Whenever your shadow in my mind passes. You belonged to other worlds.... Extraterrestrial..  Brighter,  Easier, Full of flowers that opened at your touch... And I… I stood behind windows, Watching the light fall on you but never on us . Do you remember our small corner?! Even now, Grown, scarred, bitter.... Half-healed from everything life has thrown and demanded of me.... Your memory returns like a shy ghost, Lingers in my soul, Sits beside my ribs, and whispers a question that time never answered: What if you had looked back? What if you tried harder?! And, what if I were patient?! But, you di...

  Part-I  £Cupid’s Question ✧ For the girl who wandered into the wrong myth Why did you stray, my moon-veined girl? Why did your shadow warm a man whose fate-line was never carved beside yours? Tell me.....was it the night, the numbness, the planet's whispers, or the way his touch pretended to read your skin like scripture? I am Cupid.... The God of Love! Born from the first spark between chaos and desire, Bow strung with the threads of destiny, Veins humming with immortal fire.... Yet even gods bruise when their chosen one lets a stranger sip from the deep sighs of her breath. You tasted him. You let him hold the name- I carved into your aura before time learned to walk. You let him enter the temple.. I built from your pulse, your sigh, your soft peach-and-rose perfume of longing. Tell me, my beloved..... Did his hands feel like prophecy? Did his mouth whisper a future I failed you to offer ? Or was it simply that you forgot.. your story was already written in my ribcage?! In...