My English Poem Collection.(Part-1)

Farheen Akter Bhuian(01.11.98--)

01.A story of loyalty.

I am loyal to you for decades and those sincerities can't be put on facades. I've been with you in all thick and thins, I've wandered with you in those dreadful rocky mountains and slippery expedients! 

So, that was my part of story. But, I forgot, You have a version of your own part in the storyline too! 

Once in a chitchat with your so called friends actually aka foes in a lavish dine, I overheard you saying, 

"Ugh, she's a loyal bitch ! Forever, barking but not biting, a docile creature that only circulates around it’s master, she is just a circle, I am the center of it!" 

Really?! 

It seems so! Here I want to rewrite the story and there's a plot twist, 

"If you think me a loyal dog, I will bite you if you are caught of security, But, if you think me a loyal baby tigress, I will rip you apart before you even start crawling!" 

Moral of the story is," Never, doubt my loyalty and never ever look down to it, Don't take my grudges for granted, I make every penny count,don't forget it!

02. A poem for the unknown. 

I compose on the rainy days 

commemorating you the unknown!

I don't know you niether do you know me,

We both met on a rolling yacht,

Come closer,touch on my spot,

Feel the warmth, Feel the rage,

Burning sensations, Lingering anigma,

Unpronounced words entangling me into 

Your charisma,

You are a prism light to me,

You are a sheer adventure! May be 

a whale and a sea,

I want to approach sailing on your channel,

Come closer hear the missed beats, 

Oh you are such a cozy mist!

Come closer today touch me like rain drops,

Let me feel every inch of you,

Today I want to write a poem about you,

If you are a shining sun I want to be 

Your rising moon,

Raise me up,hold me,I am falling,catch me,

But your words save me,come closer you

The mighty unknown!

What's right what's wrong,

I am in a dillema,I am confused,

You may come closer I might flee,

You may watch me,I might hide,

I am afraid,don't push me on my limits,

Don't see me like this way,don't show me affection,

Cause I will fall for you and I don't want to fall again,

Here in this era,I, me,myself am a big question,

Who says love is loved once,its a miracle,

Everytime I see you I love you from a distance

I don't have the courage,I am not outspoken,

You are so big,I am in the cradle,

You know how to play while I am learning,

You have your own regime whilst I am searching,

You have your identity,I am in crisis,

Hey,you can be a legend of my dreams,

I can preach your style everywhere,

Teach me what you know,show me 

What you got,

Hold me with all your strength,

I want to be fragile like feathers in your arms.

Hey,unknown recognize me?

I am the one conforming you!

03. Urban City and Urban Glam. 

Urban city and urban glam,

We wake to see a gloomy dam,

Dam of burdens and high hopes and fall downs, 

We wake to hear moonsoon rain and think 

Sky is also pouring down to our pain! 

Urban City and Urban glam,

We wake up with unfulfilled acts,

Only to see deep down to doom, to merge,

To outlive our own dreams and parts and 

Feel inexistent while still existing on this land!

Urban City and Urban glam! 

You put a sham on my face! 

04. Nihilistic cage. 

Found solace in solitude,

My inner voice speaks to me,

My soul sings lullaby to me daily,

My heart pours devotion to myself,

Finally, I have found peace with myself

and stopped conquering the world,

Because it is the world inside that one has

To conquer.

It is the reign inside that one has to sustain,

It is the wisdom inside that one has to hear,

It is the solace in solitude that makes solitariness  great ever after.

Endless journey begins here.

You are anything and nothing-at the same time!

Nihilistic cage is untied! 

05. Deeply in wound.

Deeply in wound you cry in pain and agony,

Deeply in wound your eyes shed blood not tears, 

Deeply in wound you are so wounded,

Still the world expects you to give them,

Still the world expects you to care for them,

Still the cruel world wants to snatch anything and everything little you have!

Still the mean world wants you to crawl in pain, 

Still this profane materialistic world wants you to materialise,objectify and brand you in 

The same skin they are just like a snake.

Deeply so wounded you are that you fail to 

Recognise whom to trust and whom not to trust, 

Deeply in wound you forget that there is none so pure as your heart that knows to love.

You have never met a heart so pure,

That can pour love.

That's why you are deeply in wound, 

So wounded you are! 

Deeply you are so wounded that you don't know

Anymore how to love!

06. Illusion of the The Illusionist.

Whole my life was a walk of illusion,

Slowly I walked out from the dream into reality

Just like dew drops fall out from moist mist! 

Whole my life I've been delusional just like a bubble,

It seems it is there but at the end with a loud clap,it busted into nothingness! 

Just like a bubble we are inclined into doing things just to prove we are existent! 

We exist to act and act ultimately to feel numb 

and nothingness!

Nothingness at the core of heart and blink of eye, we see illusional dimensions! 

Don't get into dilemma, Don't be delusional!

Everything comes into the point of nothingness! 

Hail the nothingness cause it brings one to life

from a drop to infinity and definitely its spontaneity will overcome all the shadows, 

Cause all shadows unite into blackouts-into nothingness!  

07. Thus spoke my destiny! 

You are my destiny!

We needed just little bit of effort,lil bit of maturity!

And here we are as a mutiny!

Opposite poles still attract each other like a mso magnetic is our collaboration, our wonderful company!

Time flies with you like feathers and again 

Time stops with you like a storm stops everything, a cyclone!

You and I are rough calamity! 

Fire can not replace fire as it ignites more fire!

Abundance of sparkle! 

You and I are a magnitude! A disaster! 

Still our unconditional love for each other wins 

the battle, earthquake! 

You are my destiny, I am a calamity, a mutiny,

Please stop this whirlwind of airstrikes and explosion! 

Be my gentle breeze that blows above the pink sky and flows over grey rivers! 

Be my gaslight, let me burn the bridges that keeps us separate, 

Be my waves so that I might take you further with me into wonderland,into a dream!

Be my courage so that I can break all the stereotypes! 

Be my hobby,my culture,my practice and passion and solidify my loyalty for you,

Build my trust like a unshakable fortress,

Cause you are my destiny! 

You are my destiny and I love you,

I can not think anything beyond you,

You are my horizon where all thoughts ignite,

You are a work of both magic and despair! 

I hate you cause I love you so much! 

I hate you cause I loved you so much! 

And we hurt each other like stone falls and 

Burn each other like hell fire,

Welcome to the hell of lifetime,

Here you and I burn in each others arm forever and forever! 

We break each other and then shape each other into newer forms,newer lifetime like a soft clay or sediment! 

You are a rollercoaster of my sentiments,

And entire range of destruction just to be born again and be alive!

Like a Phoenix we rise from ashes and build somber clad!

Cause you are my destiny!!! 

I am your destination, you emerge into me!

Emerge into me I am a whirlpool of eternity! 

Catch me before I am lost into infinity!

Find me there and walk with me on the margins of 

shadows of yours that I show you cause I am your mirror! 

I am your reflection whatever you do cause I am your mirror!

And you are my destiny! 

Don't provoke me to be a rebel, a mutiny!

Don't you mess with my psyche, you psycho!

Remember my company like you always do,

Never forget my fragrance, cause we are our own elegance,

And make our love legendary! 

08. Detention, a condition!

You are my syndrome, I am your symptoms 

I am your addiction,you are my concoction! 

We are in a heaven-like detention!

But detention is not cure,it is a condition!

Hey,you!

Do you admit what a red rose signifies?!its attraction?!

It is its beauty but don't adore,don't succumb to beauty,Cause all beauty hides untold scars,

Dangers!

Don't objectify that beauty if you can't feel the numbness of loosing it and afford to undertake risk, 

Risk of loosing yourself in order to adore a perspective, 

Risk of loosing yourself to forget uneven unhealed past and mess with each others unreasoned reasons,

Rise like a sun as it stands alone and share its light to entire universe,

And also to the epitome of beauty-the moon and stars,

Be a sun that sets and rises again and again and again! 

If a system lost,don't emerge into the system,

Create a new world of yours,a new paradigm,a new perspective, a new system!

Rise above the chaos that beholds your soul to unleash, to uprise,towards ultimate self-seekingness- self- realization  and actualization is a joy!A joy of discovery, 

A joy of unfinished tales!

You want to hear those tales, babe?!

Let's meet on the end of the world-where you and I share a common abode!

Death! 

Wholesome and great!

Fear the fury,Fury of greatness!

09. A vivid learner. 

Sometimes a coach, other times a learner,

but always an observer!

what can you see in my eyes??!

It is a valid question with invalid answers,

Well partner, I want to hear a correct one!

please keep trying!

10. Despair. 

Running...running from the chaos that you own,

Running from self and diminishing it to conquer what?! 

Inner demons or scars?! 

Ambition is what but an illusion,

 Abrupt elimination of past, 

That you want to replace with a better future! 

Void in self and void in life, you want to fill those 

up with glorious acts-you want to prove, 

You are seen, you are heard of and you are felt,

Accepted and receiving love, 

Untill the time you discover that whenever you are giving you receive what you want or what you Don't want! 

Despair! Despair of your existence once,

You loose the capability of what and who you are! 

11. Garbage.

Hail the inner-voice! 

The third eye or intuition.

It never lies.

Being a Con does not make you intelligent, 

Tricking people does not give you power, 

In this foolish world tricksters are given privilege, 

Con artist are made intellectuals, 

And fraudulent are thought to be master! 

Open your eyes!

Open your eyes! 

Oh,You foolish!  

Tricksters will always be a garbage and 

They will bargain for garbages! 

12. Abundance. 

Those who have abundance of something don't know the value of it, 

Those who have abundance of wealth, intellect or love do not know how to use it! 

It just flows! 

Flows like a river without any direction until it is submerged into the ocean.

Until it looses its identity and fades away! 

Those who have abundance of anything are foolish of all, cause they do not know how to keep it.

Those who have abundance of anything, 

They do not know what sacrifice is.

What letting go and giving is, 

What building is from the ashes, What ground zero means! 

They do not know what basement means! 

Those who have abundance in anything, they only know how to measure the height but do not know how the height is gained, how to climb it! 

Foul are those who Don't know what abundance means and are not thankful of what they own in plenty is!

13. Practicing capitalism with spiritualism... 

Exercise spirituality over liberalism,

Actually practice capitalism with spiritualism! 

Then only can humanity flourish! 

But, agency of both of these ideologies-

does not they have a continual clash on?! 

There can be no middle-ground and business does not know humanism! 

Does spirituality know profanity and profit gaining 

Mechanism?

And if they too are merged, 

Then comes social business, 

Business with socialism! 

Duh, what a joke! 

Underneath lurks clutches of capitalism! 

Spirituality rots there, stinks humanism! 

But, who does anything for free?! 

Oh, you free man, ask yourself a question and do 

Pity on yourself, 

Are you a free-man?! 

Does economic slavery makes you independent?! 

Or, just you are another slave to system for its own beneficiaries?! 

Are you truely independent?!comprehension!ing into more poverty and daily necessities,

For everything is now institutionalized and not free of, even the breath you take, you have to count cash for, ugh! Modern pathology! 

Oxygen saturation and many more! 

What makes a human being individual? 

What makes him truely free and not biased?! 

Aren’t you and me both the production of system?! 

Alive to be Alike?! 

Influenced and not so influenced! 

What it is to be not so influenced?!  

Nothingness!! 

Everything turns out to be nothing! 

Nothingness turns out to be everything,

It is just a differentiation of comprehension.

14. Introspect

Emotional slavery derives from economic slavery, 

Economic slavery produces emotional dependency, 

But, When freed from economic hardships, 

can man earn slight independence from certain people, place,situation or context but not out of the whole broader system that will always want you to be a slave, 

You are free from one person but slave to another,

Now,that's the system.

However, Wise are those who don’t sell emotion for economy, or does not  ponder upon economy so much, give it so value, 

Do not surrender to economic conditions and let it overpower you, your supposition! 

For achieving great emotional well-being we earn money,

We tend to think we can buy intangible things with money and higher economic status! 

Nuts you are! And so wrong you are! 

Do not sell or live your emotions for economic conditions, to make it better or worsen it! 

It is merely just a condition not an in-born situation! 

And, success should not be measured with the given parameter but should come out from your own introspection!!  

Bravo! 

Go on a journey of infinite non-identification! 

thought.

15. Ponder upon thoughts... 

And faith builds you, 

Does not destructs you, 

Yes it can put you in trials and tribulations, 

It can test you!

To strengthen more and to fill the loopholes and gaps with more compassion and kindness! 

Only faith in something can uplift you and take 

You to the direction of ultimate progression whatever was meant for you.

Despise once and be doubtful about your existence,

You loose the sight of what you are holding tight! 

It is a failed operation and you are a failure,

Failure for you not to understand and comprehend the meaning of a blessing, 

You wear an attire of misdiagnosis, 

You take pills of wrong pathology, 

You are medicated for false ailment,

You are hospitalized(jailed) for no reason, 

In your own thoughts for having those thoughts,

Thoughts are the measure of what you are doing, 

Beware of what you think and what you are going to believe, 

It may be just a response or trigger. 

Not your whole thought,existence and being! 

17.God is the God of order

If it was not for God, 

Would I be able to accept you as mine-my 

Part ever?! 

If it was not for God, 

Would I make you my soul-tie?! 

A part of my soul and let it be filtered?! 

If it was not for God, 

Would I ever be able to find solace and 

restore faith and order?! 

By attempting to love you and again falling in love, 

I found my inner-God in harmony and pleased,

Better to be a God-pleaser than to be a people-pleaser! 

Hence, I will say my love for you is a roadmap 

Towards the devotion of God-under construction and 

rebuilding-inner-faith and freedom! 

Devoted to God and higher spirits can make you 

Truely independent, cause then you know what are the basics and urgent needs, 

For God is the God of order! 

And, order is what makes patterns and incidents meaningful! 

Everything is predestined but it is a free will to 

Understand the destiny and work upon! 

Oh, you fraudulent, fear the wrath of GOD!

18. Eyes

Your eyes is the doorway to spirituality, 

Also your eyes is the doorway to corruption and a hell for eternity! 

Look what you shall look and find serenity,

Look what you can look upon that is holy! 

Look what you are permitted to see!

Look what  you are limited to and know your boundary! 

Because what you see and want to see, 

Makes desire and desire further makes you act 

And takes you to that direction, 

As the eyes idealizes what you see!

Make a deal with your eyes, cover it with a lid,

Cause your footsteps depends on it! 

©®Farheen

19. Inner God

Those who think themselves of god, 

Act like one, 

Those who claims the throne, 

Believe that they deserve all the accolades and can create chaos.

Those who think themselves godly, 

They can overpower and seize all the rights-thinks it to be their inherited right to domineer,

Domination-they think it as a virtue to act upon. 

Those who does not oblige by God becomes the deviant version of God-The evil, 

And is devoid of its very own essence-The inner-God. 

20. Sweetheart 

You are my armor, 

I need your love and affection 

More and more! 

You are my sweetheart for whom my 

Heart beats so fast and only with you 

I am steadfast! 

You keep me grounded,

You are the nucleus of my life and its orbit 

Is our up and down journey and yah,

its round and beautiful!

I do not want to forget your face,

I Don't want to forget your words and acts, 

Everytime you renew all your greatness and 

I can not see myself stranded away with you,

You are a gift sent to me from heavens! 

Protect me in your arms forever! 

We will build our own world very different!!!

©® Farheen Akter Bhuian (Nancy) 

Writer, Poet,essayist and scriptwriter. 

Post-graduate  student, 

Department of Sociology, University of Dhaka. 

Contact info: farheenancy@gmail.com